Seeking Membership
The Amins
Testimony of Dave Amin
I was saved at a church camp when I was nine. I wasn’t interested in anything about God. All of a sudden, I was smitten – believing it, and under a crushing conviction that it was necessary and immanent to pray to God immediately. I was regenerated in that instant.
Testimony of Maria Jose “Mona” Amin
I was born and raised in Colombia. Due to the violence in our country, my parents sought to leave their well established lives and move to the States. After 2 years of living in Florida we moved to London. I was 11 years old. I was raised in a very religious Roman Catholic family. I actually considered becoming a nun. I was raised to respect, value and honour the faith and traditions of the Catholic church. I was baptized, did my first communion and completed my confirmation by the age of 13. I took my religion very seriously, and my family, particularly my grandparents, made it very clear that they were very proud of me. I believed that God loved me and had set me apart. I now know that He had written eternity in my heart, as Ecclesiastes says.
Despite the fact that I felt very strongly about my religion, I remember wondering, why did Jesus die for me? Why are we always mourning his death? I was taught that he died for our sins, but I did not know what effect that had in my life. I was taught to do good deeds, and fulfill the sacraments, as this is what gets us into heaven. There are two reasons I held on to my religion with so much passion: I believed that through good deeds, fulfilling the sacraments, and be devoted to the Virgin Mary and the saints, I could have been healed from a physical impairment, and that God would give me a family, a man who would love me, and children we would raise and love together. In fact, playing house was my favourite childhood pretend play game, this was my never ending game.
Let me talk about these two idols I held onto so dearly in my heart. First, I believed (and still believe) that God could do a miracle in my life. A miracle my parents and family sought after with all their hearts, commitment, devotion and financial investment as they provided me with the best medical treatment in the country. You see, I was born with a physical impairment. I have a visual disability. I have a few congenital conditions, that humanly speaking, cannot be cured. The most notable ones are an atrophy in my optic nerves, meaning, my optic nerves stopped developing when my mom was pregnant. The effects on me are that I have limited vision. I am mostly blind from my right eye. Furthermore, I have nigstasmus, which is the involuntary movement and shaking of both of my eyes. I am very nearsighted, and I require a few accommodations in my life so I can be as independent as I can. Growing up with this impairment meant that I grew up with a lot of embarrassment, shame, anger, guilt and impatience. Let me clarify, I do have vision capabilities and I am able to have a normal life, from the perspective of outsiders, unless you notice me doing something strange (like really looking at a book up close, so close sometimes it could touch my nose, or you could be waving at me and wonder why I am not waving back from a distance), but it’s because this is almost an invisible disability that also makes it hard for me because I grew up feeling that people would not understand me. I was so angry that I was made fun of at school for needing extra help, or doing odd things. I had a lot of pride in my heart. I wanted to be able to be independent in the same ways everyone else was. Growing up, I recall accepting some help, but utterly declining other help. I am sad to say that I believe I could have performed better in school and university, had I accepted the accommodations offered. But I was (and can still be) prideful.
My second idol was love and the idea of a family. I wanted to be loved and cherished so much, that I remember being perpetually infatuated and, what I believed was “in love” with boys from my class and school growing up. I was very shy. I did not have friends that were boys. I was very nervous around the boys that I liked. To make a long story short, my heart was broken and so thirsty for love. I was so sick of being heartbroken, and frankly, taken advantage of, in different ways, by guys who knew I was vulnerable. I remember when I was heartbroken time and time again, I would ask God why this hurt so much, why I was in so much pain, why I was not loved by a guy. I actually felt so much shame for how I was tearing my heart in pieces by giving it away. I actually remember the first time I felt heartbroken, when I was in grade 9, I looked at the crucifix on the wall and cried so loudly and angrily and I was asking Jesus to help me. To the outer world, my struggle could seem petty, or that it was “high school drama”, it could have been called innocent, as I did not really date, but I can confess that I was so broken and in so much pain, and no one saw it.
The idol of love was crushed in the year 2005. I was in grade 10. My friend invited me to her “protestant” church, and I declined many times. I specify that it was protestant because, as a Catholic, I was brought up despising and looking down on protestants. To get her off my back, I decided to attend her church once. I recall that my parents sat me down before my friend’s parents picked me up, and reminded me of the faith I was brought up in, and that protestants do not believe in Mary. I told them that I knew that, and that I was just going with my friend this one time. When we got to church that day, the worship had already started. As we walked to find spots, I couldn’t help but observe people clapping, raising their hands, singing with their eyes closed, and singing with passion. I was amazed. I then started paying attention to the worship and was in awe of how these people could express their love for God and sing of His love for us. I was in tears. I instantly felt like I was at home, like God had called me to be his own. I remember the preaching of the pastor that day. For the first time in my life I understood why Jesus had died for our sins and that he had given us eternal life. I told my parents that I actually really liked the church and wanted to keep going. There are many details I wish I could share right now, but for time’s sake, I’ll just say that over the following 2 years, my family all came to church and eventually we were all going to church together. The most important detail here is that prior to my parents going to the “protestant” church, they almost got a divorce, and I saw God at work in their marriage.
I cannot point to the day I was saved. It could have been the day I went to the “protestant” church for the first time, the day I felt at home. But I believe that the day I gave my whole self to God was the day that I found out the guy I was seeing was going after one of my best friends. I am embarrassed to say this, but this guy actually had a girlfriend, and it was not me, or my friend. I had been going to church for maybe a couple of months by this point. I knew enough of the gospel and the love of God for us that I knew what I needed to do. I remember this day like it was yesterday. I decided to take a bath because I needed privacy to cry. As the hot, sour tears were running down my face, I prayed and I told God that I could not do this anymore. I knew I was a sinner. I knew I had sinned and had been sinned against time and time again. I remember telling God I could not do this anymore, I give you my heart, I told him. This was the most sincere prayer I had ever prayed. I wanted HIM and only HIM to be the one who satisfies my heart and soul.
That day God did a miracle in my life. I remember that after I came out of the bath, I felt a peace, a peace that surpasses all understanding. I felt I loved Jesus more than anything or anyone else. It did not make sense to me, but it’s not supposed to, is it? I was different. I felt new. After this day, all I wanted to do was learn all the worship songs so I could sing my heart’s desire. I wanted to be in his presence. I wanted to read my bible, for myself. I wanted the Holy Spirit to fill me. This was the beginning of my journey as a daughter of the King, the lover of my soul. I wish I could say that after this I patiently waited to meet my future husband, but the journey was not easy. Shortly after I became a Christian I dated a Christian guy. Sadly, we were both very young and immature. This relationship did not go well, and I was heartbroken again. Through our immaturity, spiritually and because of our youth, we hurt each other deeply. After this break up, in 2008, I felt a calling from the Lord, to not date, to not open my heart to any guy. I felt a deep conviction, for the first time in my life, to take some time to get to know the Lord, on my own, with a group of believers, and to guard my heart.
The following year was the most amazing year of my spiritual walk as a believer. There is so much I learned that I wish I had time to share, but all I can say for now is that the Lord really became my rock, and the Lord I can trust. When I got to know my now husband, Dave, I was at a point in my journey, where I felt I was enjoying the Lord so much that even though I wanted to say “yes” to Dave’s lovely pursuit of my heart, for the first time in my life, I felt aware and capable to admit that even though I admired, respected, and liked Dave so so so much, and I wanted to get to know him, I felt strong enough to tell Dave that I was in a journey to get to know Jesus. Please do not misunderstand me, I did not view this time in my life as the “Jesus is my boyfriend” type of thing LOL, I was really getting to know the beautiful truths of the gospel, and I felt that for the first time in my life, I met someone who wanted to know me with pure intentions, and I loved so much how Dave talked about the gospel, about Jesus. I wanted to get to know him so so much, but at the same time I was aware that allowing the opportunity of growing in a relationship with Dave would actually distract me from where my heart was. After much prayer and counsel, I decided to say “yes” to getting to know Dave, and it has been such a joy, throughout the last 11 years, to get to grow in my love for this man; a man who loves the Lord, leads me, and encourages me to love Jesus first. The LORD’S timing was perfect. I am beyond thankful to God for my marriage to Dave. I love him so much!
My second idol, healing of my eyesight, was torn in 2013. I was working for a bank in Mississauga. I did not see an error I made on the computer, and this mistake cost the business thousands of dollars. I was shaken. I was angry, ashamed. Because I did not seek to obtain the accommodations I needed, my vision was greatly affected. My eyes and head suffered a lot of pain. I needed help. I needed so much help. Not only to help me manage my condition, and learn how to take care of myself, but I also needed the Lord to work in my heart. I am thankful for God’s grace through my job. I was given 3 months of short term disability so I could be seen by some amazing ophthalmologists. Again, there are so many details I wish I could share, but for now, I can say that through visual treatments, some amazing biblical counselling books, and my small group, God showed me again that he loved me and had a purpose for what he had allowed into my life. All my life I had been avoiding and pushing away this area of my life. My heart was so hard. Sadly, when I was a new believer, I was told by my mentors that God would heal me if I had enough faith, and the reason he had not healed me is because I actually did not have enough faith. I thought I had been fighting to have faith that God would heal me since I was a young child. Today I do not believe this teaching. Today I believe that, yes, absolutely, God is able to heal me. However, I also believe that God created my body and he was, and is, sovereign over my eyesight. In my case, I believe God has called me to focus on Him, His work through and in my impairment, rather than to focus my spiritual walk and emotional energy on healing, even though I know he is able to do it. Remember the blind man whom Jesus healed in John 9? His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” After this man was healed, Jesus was asked “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him”. There is a lot that I have learned about in this area of my life, and I could talk about it for a long time, but for now, I can say that I am thankful that God is using my weakness, my visual impairment to sanctify me, to bring me to himself, and to be made more like Jesus. And I am thankful that He has given me 20/20 vision when it comes to salvation, for once I was blind and now I can see. If he does not heal my eyesight on this side of eternity, I know I will see him perfectly in heaven.
I will share one more story about God’s work in my life. One of the most beautiful miracles God did in my life is the gift of being a mother. After years of waiting, God said “yes” to this prayer. In His perfect timing, God made Dave and I parents. I am so thankful for this. I am enjoying this season of motherhood so so much! It has not all been easy. There have been a lot of tears (especially during the first 2 months after delivery), but I am learning how to be a mommy, and I love it. My main prayer now days is that God would bring him to himself more and more, because I know that the greatest need my husband and son have is for me to love Jesus first.
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Testimony of Gaurav Bhosale
Born in a small Christian family, I was baptised in 2011 mainly because the worship leader at the time wanted me to get baptised so I could serve in the worship team. Even though I had a sense of what Christ did for me on the cross, I still lived like the world.
Fast forward 2018, I was appointed as the worship leader in my church. And then 2019 when I first heard a message by Pastor Paul Washer that wrecked me. Oh wretched man that I am, who can save me? Those words really made sense for the first time. As a worship leader then, I had conflicts with the pastor on various theological matters. The more I read the word, the Holy Spirit kept opening my eyes to the fallacies of my church at the time. I had discussions and debates with my Pastor and elders at the time, mainly on the topic of misuse of tongues and prophecies where I was told that the only evidence of being saved is tongues and that implied I wasn’t! I was called critical and mean spirited to question the church’s beliefs in light of scriptures. Granted I should have been loving and not aggressive (cage stager). Being lied to all your life doesn’t justify speaking truth without love. Even though I still am in good terms with my ex pastor and church members, I knew that I couldn’t stay there anymore.
The word of God since then has helped me and reformed me daily and is still reforming me. God has humbled me to escape the cage stage and to deal with fellow Christians more gracefully even though I admit I may fail at times.
Here’s a quote by St. Augustine that is dear to my heart and has provided much comfort in my journey: “Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.”
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Testimony of Maris Grewe
I grew up within a Christian household, but did not make my faith my own until I was in college. During the in between years, my family had encountered tough relationships in the church after going through a church split and aiding in planting a new church. My faith took a back seat during high school and my early college years. During this time, I had a false sense of a relationship with Christ. I thought my sins could be forgiven on my deathbed as long as I completed the ‘to-do’ list of religious activities and I would still be accepted into Heaven.
After a semester abroad spent partying on the weekends and coming home to a busy & drastically “empty” social life, I began to engage back with the church merely out of a duty to fulfilling expectations. Sitting in the pew, I began to sit under expository preaching that started to show me what sinning against a holy God truly meant. This planted the seed initial seeds of wanting to know more. I moved to a small town with no friends and dove into the Word and several books I received as graduation gifts from my previous church. My heart began to change as I realized I had understood things wrong for so long.
I had the opportunity to move back home and sit again under the preacher who had sown the initial seeds. Connecting and intentionally involving myself in the church brought about great friendships, opportunities, and clarifications on what being a follower of Christ truly meant. I recommitted my life to Christ in the fall of 2017. Two years later as I was preparing for church membership, I decided to be re-baptized as I had gained a new understanding of being a child and servant of Christ Jesus. Since then, God has been working in my heart to understand the deep benefits of living in community with other believers, especially through the separation caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. Now, my daily battle has centered on personal devotions and time in prayer with the Lord.
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Testimony of Quitlys Garcia
When I was a boy, my parent brought me to church, but as an adult I continue coming because God is Real, and He loves me… and I feel His love in my life even though I don’t deserve it.
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Testimony of Catalina Albarracin
I grew up in a Catholic, Christian hater family. We only went to “church” whenever there was a special event or my mother felt like it. When I was in my teen years, I did not care for the repetition and rituals of the Catholic church, but I did believe in God; when I struggle I will pray and I will also give Him thanks (I felt good, but I will do this in the hiding as I was talking to God and not reciting the so-called prayers I was taught).
When I left (2008) my parents’ house and moved to the USA, God used a person, Daniel (my husband now), to start questioning my beliefs and where my heart was. When Daniel asked me about some of these prayers (Mary’s prayer to be specific) and my knowledge (The commandments mainly) while showing me the Bible, it was like God opened my eyes immediately. Everything that was in my heart made sense with what was in my head. I came to understand that salvation comes by grace through faith and not works and that this is only possible through Jesus Christ.
Even though it was and still is hard to step away from my old life, the freedom and joy I have in my Lord and saviour Jesus Christ is unmeasurable. My relationships changed, my anger is not consuming me (though I still struggle with it), my thoughts and attitudes are not selfish, even though they tend to cause me trouble when it comes to submitting to my husband, and the things of the world are not as enticing anymore, I crave to know my God and Lord more than my former self activities and things (nightlife, material things, money, gossip, speech, relationships, etc).
It has been a process of sanctification and many moves, but in 2009 I found a church that I truly loved and its pastor and wife were important in my growth as a baby Christian. That’s when I understood the importance of baptism and our daily walk with the Lord. I was baptized in October 2009 as an act of obedience and proclamation to the world that I belong to the one and only God. Ever since I have strived to live for Christ and make Him known not only to others but in my life too. I have become a repenter and thankful person in my constant battle with pride and doubt. I can’t wait to be a part of the local church and submit to the authority of the church, rejoice and grow with other believers, and be able to serve the bride of Christ.
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Testimony of Daniel Restrepo
I grew up in a church going family. This allowed me to be exposed to the teachings of the Bible consistently in my youth. For several years, I thought that going to church made me a Christian. Despite calling myself a follower of Jesus then, I was lost and seeking to gain my way to heaven by being a well behaved boy. At age 15, I had the opportunity to go to a Christian camp, where my eyes were opened, and when I believe the Lord started revealing my sin and showing me the need for repentance. After that, I began searching the scriptures on my own, and craving truth and fellowship with believers.
Shortly after that, I started studying in university and this proved to be a challenging time in my life, where I often struggled to put away self and live the life that I have been called for. During this time, the Lord was faithful (as He has always been), and kept me for himself. All along, I continued my studies, which took me to different cities in the US. This included a Christian university in South Carolina, and finally to Sojourn Church in Belleville, Illinois. In this last church, God placed in my life true discipleship and I was introduced to the doctrines of Grace and the importance of the local church.
This was the time in my life, I started to understand that there is nothing I can do to save myself, that I was an enemy of God, and that by His grace alone, he saved me from myself onto Him. I understood that it is God who changes our hearts of stone and gives as a heart of flesh as we see in the book of Ezekiel. There, I learned to study the Bible and was entrusted to lead a campus Bible study and to teach in small groups when needed. I can now testify that I was lost, but the Lord Jesus Christ died for me to pay for my sin, but not only that. He also restored the relationship that was broken with God. I am in peace because I know that He forgives my sin and that He will keep me secure for ever. I look forward to Jesus’ second coming and long to be eternally with Him. I am also aware that I am a sinner and that I sin more than I like to admit, but I rejoice that we have an advocate before the father, our Lord Jesus Christ. As explained in 1st John 2.
As you may know, I am married to Cata and I am blessed to be called father by Juli and Tommy. The Lord is currently working in my life as I continue to learn how to lead my family to Him. I am also learning to love the Church and to be more graceful as God is with us. I am striving to live a life of prayer and I ask my Lord to increase my faith. I also pray that the Lord will make me bold to step out of my comfort zone to proclaim the Gospel, which I believe is the power of God for salvation.